Isn't having an UnderArmour logo on your catcher's breastplate a blatant contradiction?

"There is no hell. There is only France." - Frank Zappa

That awkward moment when you thought you'd sliced the noodles of the ramen soup enough but then realize that you totally look like an Ood.

What's funnier: that you can purchase a download of Cage's 4'33", or that you can install it as a ring tone?

That awkward moment when you refer to terror alert levels Bert and Ernie and some 16 year old kid doesn't know what your'e talking about.

the flaw of just about any online poll-based contest: on the internet, nobody knows your dog has 24 separate email addresses for one inbox.

Irony noticed while shopping at Microcenter yesterday. The room that used to be the books center is stripped down to just a small fraction of its original size. Instead, the room is now mostly full of laserprinters.

Print is dead, yet the printer business is thriving.

didn't watch the superbowl halftime show, and in fact hasn't since an act pulled such a stunt on the stage and the airwaves that has etched itself into my brain forever as a sign that we've just gone too far as a society...

I am, of course, talking about "Up With People".

 

Replacing an expired cert in IIS is a 12-step program. Only unlike AA, you don't feel any better on the other side when it is done. All that work, and you're still as dependent on Microsoft as you were before...

 
 

The malt bone connected to the yeast bone, the yeast bone connected to the hops bone, the hop bone connected to the barley bone, now drink the Beer of the Lord...

I went through my entire thirties without ever seeing Thirty-Something. Did I miss anything?

 

Email: "You almost missed an incredible offer!"

<delete>

Me: "Thanks for the warning, now I'm sure I definitely missed it."

 
 
 
 
 

I miss Tower Records. It was nice when there was a place for people that Hot Topic wouldn't hire.

Someone posted an Irish (Gaelic) phrase or poem. Facebook kindly offered to click to translate. I clicked.

It said exactly the same thing, as is. And added the line:

"Translated from Polish"

 
 
 
 

Patton's speech at the beginning of the 1970 film would be funnier if continuously interrupted by Monty Python's old ladies clapping footage.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

That annoying moment when facebook's notification icon pops red just as you press the mouse button on the tab's X...